There's one side of love that brings your heart and your mind to the highest heavens. Angels play harps and send perfect melodies through your ears. The world's perils are brought to a halt and you know no existence of sadness and tears. For every heaven, however, there reigns a hell, and sometimes love finds its dwelling amongst those fires.
Perhaps the most painful part of love is parting from a person that you've loved for such a long time. It's hard to be so immersed in pools of goodness and affection then have it disappear in an instant. Once a relationship ends, everything good that exists in the world seems to turn evil. It's almost impossible not to become Mr. Scrooge after experiencing this type of loss. After "losing love," it's difficult to believe that you could stand to go through this again. You think about all the time that you have invested into falling in love, and you fear the thought of not only spending more time on trying to fall in love with another person, but also the idea that you could get hurt again.
A person with a broken heart is at first pessimistic. Give that person time, and he or she will eventually realize that being consistently sad, guilty and lonely is not the way to live life and progress into being the person that he or she has always wanted to be. A miraculous thing will happen after a little time has passed - that person will make a return to his or her "old" ways. He or she will become himself of herself again. He or she is no longer emotionally attached to the significant other that could have been "the one."
A little more time and then that person will be open to the idea of falling in love again. Although the pain of the previous love left a deep, never-healing scar buried in the soul, there is a particular spark in this potential "lover" that ignites the hope flame. However, although that flame is eager to burst and live, there is still that overhanging fear that threatens to extinguish hope.
What is the best remedy for fear? I've heard stories of people with a fear of heights that go skydiving in order to overcome their fear. I suppose it seems that the best remedy is to just jump in front of your fear's face and show it who's boss. Have no fear in order to overcome your fear, and life moves on. However, with a subject as intricate as love, it doesn't seem so easy. How can you so boldly face something that is attached to factors such as emotion, affection and more? This powerful entity is something that we ALL experience. Fears of heights, cockroaches and dead people affect us deep inside, but they do not reach the crevices that love lives within.
What is the best remedy for fear of love? How do we press stop on the repeating thought in our head that screams, "You don't want to invest even more time in another relationship or risk getting hurt again!"? Should we just take a risk and jump into the cold water? If we do jump right in, we know that at least a learning experience will emerge from what will happen. And if we don't jump in? I suppose we'll never know what could have happened, and we will always wonder...
So, if you're fresh out of a relationship and feel that the world is crumbling down on you - I understand. Just give it a little time, and you'll be back to your old self. You will love again. When you think you've found the person that you would like to try your "luck" with, have at it! Why not? Honestly, you may get hurt again and you may have to spend more time on developing this relationship, but I feel that the more you do this, the easier it gets, and the more peace of mind you will have. You'll live a happier life without a big block of wonder weighing you down. You'll have no regrets, because the experiences you have will bring you to places that you can't even imagine.
Just remember to never lose the grasp of who you are when you give in to love. In all reality, when it seems that you've lost everything, you will ALWAYS have yourself. If you don't even really know who you are or what you enjoy, then life will be much more difficult.
Don't fear love. Take risks. Live life.
He or she will become himself of herself again. He or she is no longer emotionally attached to the significant other that could have been "the one."
ReplyDeleteWhen you think you've found the person that you would like to try your "luck" with, have at it! Why not? Honestly, you may get hurt again and you may have to spend more time on developing this relationship, but I feel that the more you do this, the easier it gets, and the more peace of mind you will have.
I like those part. They are very true. Each time you are hurt helps you to find the right person, "the one," and each time you do, in fact, gain a better perspective of the big picture. As I am reading each of your pieces, I am seeing that everything you are talking about ties together.
Oh yes, the last line, "Don't fear love. Take risks. Live life," is the best line. I feel like people should let that motto lead them. :)